s we get older in life, we have buried more and more under us, than we have pushed behind us and kept moving forward. When we bury stuff under us, it follows us. When you don’t address things that have caused you ANY sort of pain, you are burying things alive.
Now, I’m no fan of horror movies, but we all know that when someone is buried alive, it always finds a way to come to the surface. Usually, when we don’t want it to. The same is true with everything you buried. Sometimes we have to truly let go in order to protect our futures from the past that inevitably will haunt you when things are going pretty damn good for you. This is how it ALWAYS works. So here are a few OTHER reasons that you need to learn to just let go….
1) it’s holding you back. You may not realize it now, you may not see it. But it is holding you back. We do not even realize that it’s there, we think, “oh, we’ve buried this, we won’t have to worry about it again.” Wrong. You have to worry about it more when it’s buried because you never know when it will show up and impact you.
2) It is impacting your daily thoughts. Unfortunately, when we don’t let things go, we make decisions and thoughts based on these same things that we are holding on to or that we buried. And most of the time we aren’t even aware that it’s happening. Until after we’ve made the decision or had the thought and we are seeing the same patterns and things we’ve been dealing with.
3) You need to let go of the past and not by burying it in order to focus on the day to day and understand how it impacts you. When you are consciously aware of the past and the things you are holding on to, it is easier to see how it impacts you today and prevents you from focusing on the day to day as we keep going back to the past and what we haven’t been able to let go of.
So now that you know, WHY you need to let go … let’s talk about HOW we let go.
Step One: Practice mindfulness. When we are aware of the control it has on us, it allows us to start taking the steps to let it go. Being mindful of what is holding you back and why it’s there makes it easier to move away from it.
Step Two: Be gentle with yourself. Understand that this is a process and not something that can happen overnight. Be patient, be understanding, be aware. When you do this, you will see that you are far stronger than you realize and it’s much easier to move away from the things that you’re holding on to.
Step Three: Physical Distance. If it’s a physical component that is holding you back, then you need to put the physical distance between you and whatever, or whoever it may be. While you mentally may still have the connection, putting the distance physically between the two can help ease the transition when you start mentally distancing yourself.
Step Four: Acceptance. Accepting that you may not get the apology, or that this was not the right thing for you, and learning from that can be huge. It can be a major factor in truly putting it behind you. I know a lot of time, we want closure, but sometimes wee won’t get that and we have to be okay with not having the closure.
Step Five: Mantras. Positive mantras are a huge way to start the mentally distancing and shifting from a buried situation to a behind you situation. These help you transition your mindset into one that can be truly beneficial to your future and how you handle people and situations in the future.
Step Six: Self-Care. When we take the time to love and care for ourselves it makes things so much easier to let go of them and move forward. We learn to care about the importance of ourselves and loving ourselves and this includes letting go of the things that no longer serve us or bring us the happiness we deserve.
And most importantly, always take away a lesson. No matter what you’ve been through, there is always a lesson. When we learn from these lessons we are better able to move forward and understand why instead of holding on to them or burying them, hoping that we’ll get the answers. We won’t always get the answers but if we can take the lesson with us, we don’t need the answer. The answer is in the lesson.
When you learn to let go, the live you lead is one with so much strength, courage and hope for a life you love.
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